REFLECTION

Bitter cold winter weekends in PA leave a lot of time to think and/or reflect. It's in the 20's here with a light dusting of snow on the grass and trees. People all over are getting ready for the holiday. My Moms house sits next to a Christmas Tree farm so people have been up and down the long drive all weekend. Cutting, dragging, and securing their dream tree on their vehicles, and did I mention FREEZING! I must admit upfront I have never been a holiday person. I know BA-HUM-BUG....blah, blah, blah. Today the house is being decorated and I would rather do anything else then help decorate. However the alternative is to go outside.

No Thank You! As I type this I am sitting at the computer with a wool sweater, wools socks and a ski hat on, pathetic I know. Thus my love of HOT Mediterranean weather.

Back to Reflection.

Over the years I have written down several quotes that have spoken to my soul.

I'd like to share some with you.

1996:

"There is a luxury in being quiet in the heart of chaos."-virginia wolf

"Sometimes it takes years to really grasp what has really happened to your life."
-william rudolph

"To sense when it's time to go is so hard-to leave a secure thing, a loving thing." "But that's what'll preserve the friendship. If you go past that time, you sacrifice it....." "But it's hard.

It is so hard."-lili taylor

2003

"Love your incredibly unique life, it is very short."-john olm

"Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my cham friends."-25th hour

"Hope and imagination are only consolations for the disappointments and sorrows of experience."-italo calvino

"The earth turned to bring us closer it turned on itself and in us until it finally brought us together in this dream." - 21grams

200?

"There are many things in life that will catch your eye but only a few will catch your heart pursue those."-unknown

2008

"Like a compass needle that points north, a man's accusing finger always finds a woman." "Always"-khaled hosseini

And my newest favorite - -

"Deliver me from him who does not tell the truth unless he stings,and from the man of good conduct and bad intentions, and from him who acquires self-esteem by finding fault in others."-kahlil gibran

The tree has arrived, Blue Spruce, and it smells amazing..........

It Can't Be Over Yet

Do you ever feel you’re in spiral motion waiting for the spinning to stop and it never does? Since December 2007 I have been living in that spiral. Hoping, praying that it will stop or at least slow down and allow me to get out. I made it through July and then came August I don’t think I will ever look at August the same again. I took a trip overseas for 3 weeks the place was incredibly beautiful but the situation was sometimes unbearable. I met some remarkable people who I know will be my friends forever and I feel so thankful to have them in my life, others I met well……

I was O so tan and enjoying the weather to the fullest but even for me the lover of sea, sun and sand I was forced to take breaks because my body was baking like a pie. Daily drinks, tons of food, late nights and not enough exercise makes Beth not on her “A” game.


Labor Day I was back in America unexpected by most but maybe not out of the question to others. Living in PA again but this time with Mom. My brother had the little one early on but now she is back in the nest. I guess at the end of the day the return was inevitable – it was too much, a chore, uncomfortable, it bucked the norm. 2 of us within a span of 6 months must have been the straw that broke the camel’s back. Now it’s the 3 of us - in the tiny homestead, it will be challenging but we need to stick together because we only have each other. I never would have thought at this stage in my life I would be spending so much quality time with my Mother let alone living with her, it’s almost surreal.

November and I am still in PA how did this happen – ha? The job market is worse than ever, no breaking news to anyone! October I took on the role of substitute teaching in the Hazleton Area School District. I could not spend another day in the house doing nothing except chores. I was going stir crazy. The majority of my classes have been at a school very close to my Mom’s house. I have had classes from K-8 and everyday is a very different experience. I have a new found respect for teachers and the rigors they take on daily. I would have thought kindergarten would be a breeze. Cute, adorable 5 year olds certainly cannot be as challenging as hormonal 7th and 8th graders. Boy was I wrong. Out of 3 different KG classes I would have to say that 1 of them was the toughest day I have had so far since I started subbing. I can’t remember if this is how I felt about subs when I was in school. Was I ever as disrespectful to teachers as the teenagers at VEMS are to me? I certainly hope not….

On a high note for November the Thorn Girls came to the East Coast. It was excellent to spend much needed bonding time with them. My girl KR-is-Ten, there is no other like her. The weekend turned out to be a mini Hafey reunion with our crew. Laughter, tears and a WHOLE LOT of kids.......

Direction: a word that seems to be missing from my vocabulary of late. Up and Down, Back and Forth, Round and Round but no straight path leading to anywhere. I guess its life but it’s so very tiring and at times frustrating. When you pour yourself into something you expect or can only hope for desired results. After all these years I should realize for me that is not an option.

I am keeping my fingers crossed, everything crossed, that my journey begins again soon.

It’s now so deep in my veins/soul it seems impossible to let go of.

STAY TUNED.......

I will be back VERY soon with some news/updates!

To be honest there has been so much going on I don't even know where the time has gone.

July, my last post, really......??

oh the horrors - sorry (dink) :0(

4th of July wishes to the crew in Morocco

Let's talk about Independence.....this has been my week to fully experience it.
My heart still resides in Morocco. I have been back in the states solo now since May 14th. Living with family and riding the roller coaster of life once again.
Spending 7 days with nothing more then your mind and wine certainly opens your eyes to many things. I made some good, which i am very proud of, decisions this week (thanks b) and others that remain questionable, also I hit a small pothole that didn't make the week any easier.
My family is on vacation in CT and Cape Cod. The annual 4th of July party at Cape Hoop. The west coast crew decided to make the trip this year too. I'm sure it's a blast.
One of my choices - to not go..........
Daily I search for a job, e-mail resumes, network, and make phone calls. It's a very humbling time and I would not wish it on anyone. This is hands down the worst time to be unemployed in the states. Damn I should have gotten on that plane.
I was very close to getting an interview at GWA in Casa. The job was to be the Admissions Officer at the school. However they decided last week the candidate needs to speak French - CRAP. It would have been a super job! They are keeping me posted if anything else comes up. The director is awesome and would love for me to come over for a visit and to meet the team. I recently found out there are now direct flights from JFK to Casa so WHY NOT! It would be as simple as a jaunt to the West Coast.

I wish I could tell you stories and adventures but they will be on hold for awhile.
I'm not giving up yet on going back or.......to "another spot" for my next adventure!

Happy Summer !!

Congrats To The Men of Morocco

112TH BOSTON MARATHON
Monday, April 21, 2008
DISTANCE - 26 miles, 385 yards (42.195 Kilometers)

2008 Top Men Finishers
1. Robert K. Cheruiyot - KEN - 2:07:46
2. Abderrahime Bouramdane - MAR - 2:09:04
3. Khalid El Boumlili - MAR - 2:10:35

Many Many Congrats also to everyone who was part of TNT this year.
WAY TO GO - I MISS YOU ALL!!

Rain, Rain, GO AWAY

Since last Thursday "happy birthday" to me. Nothing, I mean nothing has gone right. It has been a non-stop week of one bad thing after another. The Black Cloud will not go away.
I hope this is not a peek at how my "XXth" year on this planet is going to be!

To top it off it is not only raining like mad in Tanger but we are getting HAIL.....
What in the world?? Thunder, Lightening and Hail on April 20th in Morocco.

TIA

So Much To Tell

I am back in Morocco living in the bustling city of Tanger.
It's been a little over a month since I arrived.
Today I spent half the day in a Moroccan police station. I wish I had my camera with me.

Sunday I was headed to Gran Canaria for a weeks vacation but due to today's events that trip is cancelled.

Now I have no excuse with a free week(other then a side trip to Casa Blanca) ahead of me to fill you all in........